Mercury Communications reckons that British Telecom has turned the simple and jolly process and activity of radiopaging into something both complicated and dull: now that it is setting up in competition with Telecom it plans to change all that, and according to the Financial Times one of its first cheery ideas promises to be a source of endless fun and embarrassment – it is a two-tone bleeper so that you will know whether it’s your wife or your mistress after you – always provided that you can remember which bleep goes with which lady.