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May 9, 2014updated 22 Sep 2016 11:24am

5 questions to ask Cortana

She’s sassy and knows everything – we’re in love.

By Joe Curtis

Microsoft recently launched its very own voice assistant, Cortana. Smart, sassy and a know-it-all, it’s nearly as easy to fall for her as for Scarlett Johansson’s AI in hit film Her.

Based on the Xbox Halo game’s AI character of the same name, Cortana was built on the same premise as Siri‘s funny personality; that a joker sets a user at ease and makes them more comfortable chatting to their phone.

And Microsoft’s lady elicits some great wisecracks if you ask the right questions.

Here’s 5 that should prompt a few gags.

She knows about the singularity

Ask her ‘who is your creator?’ and she refers to the age-old science fiction trope of the singularity – when self-aware robots take over the world.

"If I knew that, I’d have self awareness. And that might be dangerous."

She’s definitely a geek

Star Trek fan? Cortana can be your fellow redshirt. Tell her to "Beam me up, Scotty!" and she’ll respond "Aye, aye, captain". Not in the Scottish accent though, sadly.

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Also, if you reference Star Wars, she’s hip with that too. Say "May the force be with you" and see what happens.

She’s swallowed a book of jokes

Just ask her to "tell me a joke" and she’ll give you a range of responses.

Our favourites include "What kind of underwear do clouds wear? Thunderpants" and "Why did the hipster burn his mouth on his coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool."

Don’t try and get too fresh, though

Don’t gush over Cortana – it won’t go down too well. She might reply: "Here’s my advice: don’t call anyone."

Cortana Xbox Halo


How Cortana appears in the Xbox Halo series (credit: Microsoft)

You’ll feel bad – so bad – about buying non-Microsoft products

She’s loyal to a fault to Microsoft. Ask her what the best search engine is (we all know it’s Google, right?) and she’ll say: "Bing bing bing! We have a winner!"

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