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December 19, 2013

Cyber Santa is coming to town

He's making a list, checking it twice and putting it in the naughtiness database.

By Cbr Rolling Blog

Here’s Santa’s problem. He works all year round to make gifts for all the nice boys and girls, but he only has a very small 24-hour window to deliver all of them.

Finances Online has imagined some helpful technologies that could help Santa out at his busiest time of year.
First up is SantaNet. It will be powered by Transcranial Pulsed Ultrasound devices worn by all of the world’s children and attached to millions of computers on an Artificial Neural Network all for the purpose of detecting who’s naughty or nice. That way Santa won’t have to keep checking his list twice.

All these computers will feed data in a humungous Data Center capable of storing Exabytes of data. Santa’s very own Naughtiness Database! In the heart of SantaNet will be the world’s most powerful supercomputer, a Christmas Cruncher capable of 33 quadrillions of calculations per second.

To help red-nosed Rudolph and his gang of reindeer deliver billions of gifts to billions of children on Christmas Eve, they could use a hyper-fast gift distribution network powered by delivery drones and Hyperloops.

And what about the elves? They need all the help they can get to manufacture just the right gift for the right child. They can use exoskeletons that multiply their gift-making magic many times over, plus self-heating roads crisscrossing the Polar Toy Hub so they don’t slip and slide while moving their precious cargo.

xmas

 

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